Rebound relationship: rehabilitation phase

Known as the first relationship after a relationship, like the "fling" that makes you get over a breakup, you go again "on the market." Sounds like something invented to inflate the pockets of good psychologists. And yet...

Fresh out of a long relationship you wake up on a little unfamiliar land, maybe even hostile. Where? Way? And what do I do now? And even before these questions arise the fear for dating other one. Routine, habits, which certainly is given to you by a stable partner is build hard and is an investment of years. You cannot be transferred to the next partner in your life, simply, with a banal gesture.

Therefore, the person that is created by a separation is considered a major test, a sampling. A trivial expression, especially if we talk about feelings and human beings and not a wheel and a gearbox. And yet, something like this happens.

The rebound relationships usually suffer because you enter in it with the whole mess of the last relationship. Resentment does not disappear so easily, the remnants of conflicts, frustrations, mistakes catch up with the fresh dating life. You attack when you least expect it. And do not dive forward with butterflies in your stomach, but rather with the whole fear of unfamiliar customs and a lack of mood.

Latest does not know what flowers you like, what's your favorite coffee shop, what to tell you when you fight with her mother. You do not know his friends, hobbies and you do not know what he has or understand what may seem some strange habits.

After dating someone for a long time, many things can seem very strange. Be prepared not to understand reactions, expressions, gestures. But be ready to experiment. Maybe it's not the man of your life and you will not end up with children and two dogs, but you'll learn something. Other places, views, people, fresh ways to laugh, to spend leisure time to flirt, to live. Every single day.

It is very possible that this relationship does not have many chances to succeed, but it makes sense to go through the rehabilitation phase. Why you still throw yourself into the rebound dating? Because you are human, dependent, and need affection, especially for confirmation and we need to relearn that people are different and there are many kinds of love. If one is finished, the next might be just a few attempts to distance. And only thus learn from mistakes. Living them and secluding them.

Saturday, 4 June 2011 13:52